i prefer the early morning option because it somehow conveys that i am, in actuality, a morning-person - nothing could be further from the truth.
an interruption: a friend just im'ed me for advice. i don't generally tout myself as someone to consult on life-altering decisions; however, it seems she feels differently. her debate is one i find many toiling over this time of year: career vs. grad school. it's like the battle of godzilla and mothra on a much smaller, less japanese scale. i can only hope i didn't ruin her life because of poor dubbing.
i had spent most of my evening preparing myself to write a paper on the representations of madness in ibsen's "rosmersholm" and "the lady from the sea". quite appropriately, i was slowly becoming a living representation of madness. having finished my second reading of "rosmersholm", i thought it wise to reread the assignment, as to better acquaint myself with the specifics of what i was writing.
the bloody paper isn't due until april 20.
this has been a recurring theme this semester. the theme being me as the worst student ever.
while i've always prided myself on the fact that i am a natural student for whom school comes quite easily, this last semester has been excrutiating. i honestly lack the will to make my education a priority. i think i am yet to turn in an assignment on time. i blame my looming unemployment.
with what was once my may graduation, now, being my august graduation (sidenote: i'm an august graduate who finishes school 3 weeks after the may commencement ceremony. explain that one.), i am still incredibly anxious about not having a job post-academia, even with the additional 3 month buffer. i have sent resumes to over 100 job postings; i have heard from 2 positions. i received offers from both companies; i will be accepting neither.
i only get the jobs i don't really want, and the jobs i want don't want me. this whole idea seems vaguely reminiscent of my love life. unfortunately, i can't apply the same strategies to both. godzilla vs. mothra, round 2.
p.s. from here on out, i will most likely be including a brief postscript section that focuses less on my thoughts and more on the humdrum of my daily life. this section is almost entirely for molly because i am certain she wants to know what i ate for lunch and if i run into people we hate.
posted by brett @ 5:32 AM
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