hedrinksalot, the blog

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

i had gotten some questions about what i look like without glasses...

yeah, i don't know why people want to know these things either.

but they do, and what kind of blogger would i be if i didn't indulge my readers' crazy needs...

alas, i decided to do them one better and let someone else tell them what (or rather who) i look like without glasses:

uh, so basically, i'm a hottie.

don't say i never warned you.

you heard it here first.
i'm hot!

oh, and i'm really like noble and self-sacrificing and like non-confrontational or something.
hooray for gandhi!

i was sad to see that anne frank didn't make the cut this time.
very sad.

this is almost as frustrating as the real thing!

happy halloween, kids!

Monday, October 30, 2006

it is breezy and in the upper 60s in chicago today.

so i ate lunch outside on a hot little date with myself.

snapped some shots to share with ch'all.

happy monday!

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

this is something i don't normally do.

(and, no, i'm not talking about posting on a regular basis, you jackass)

no, it is not in my usual nature to do such a thing.

yes, it is so very unlike me.

i am going to recommend some tunes to ch'all.

*shock* *awe*

so the album i think all y'all need to be listening to is:

*drumroll*

11:11 by maria taylor

while it was released in may 2005, i only recently uncovered this gem. maria used to be a part of azure ray, so if you're a fan of theirs then you simply must run on over to your music outlet of choice and pick up 11:11. the album is tight and well-produced. maria's voice lilts and floats from one song to the next... never strained, never trying too hard, always exactly where it needs to be. the lyrics are heady but light, telling stories that never present themselves in any immediate fashion.

songs of note (though all 10 are lovely and wonderful):
-two of those too
-one for the shareholder
-xanax (hellooooo, a song called xanax... what's not to love?)
-hitched!

it is all what my mother would call "college music", and yes, my mother does steal vocabulary from beavis & butthead. however, mopey-mellowness aside, it is a wonderful album.

check it out!

Monday, October 23, 2006

it quickly approaches.

the most magical evening of the year.

halloween... it cometh (all over your face).

i'm sure i've mentioned it before, but it bears repeating that halloween is probably my favorite holiday of the year. costumes. scary movies. and most importantly, free food. yes, i count candy as a worthy meal.

this year, i am attending a costume party, and am so incredibly excited about my (less-than-original) costume. yes, while i have for many years been recognized for my ability to create original and intriguing costumes on a shoestring budget and with minimal supplies, this year i cheated.

while halloween's past have been marked with nights as slutty dorothy of oz or slutty superman or slutty snoopy (i shit you not... and all three costumes were but one part of larger group costumes), this year i let slutty fall by the wayside and went with that tried and true costume method followed by sorority girls the world 'round - sexy ____.

i am just as ashamed as you, but beyond my shame, there lies sheer excitement... for this year, i am being:

okay, well not exactly. i'm being that only with quite a bit more grease and quite a bit less high-heel action. i'm still debating the stalkings.

for you see, i am being a sexy mechanic.

and effectively becoming the most blue collar i have ever been in my entire life.

i've got grease, a "wife beater" tank top, a tool belt, and most importantly, a mechanic's jumpsuit that fits me like a glove/a second skin/it was painted on.

the excitement is palpable... and that night, let's hope it's also visible.

10-4 my good buddies.

much love,

Thursday, October 19, 2006

it's now like the third week of october, which means...

my television schedule is all worked out.

and for the first time in a long, long time... it's effing full.

let's take a look, shall we:

monday

7:00 - cbs- how i met your mother
7:30 - cbs - the class
8:00 - nbc - heroes (duh)
----> 8:30 - cbs - the new adventures of old christine (a la dvr)
9:00 - nbc - studio 60 on the sunset strip

tuesday

7:00 - cw - the gilmore girls
8:00 - cw - veronica mars
9:00 - fx - nip/tuck

wednesday

7:00 - cw - america's next top model (duh)
8:00 - abc - lost
9:00 - abc - the nine
-----> 9:00 - bravo - project runway (though this is no longer... yay, jeffrey!)

thursday

7:00 - NOTHING
8:00 - abc - grey's anatomy (duh)
9:00 - NOTHING

friday

7:00 - NOTHING
8:00 - abc - men in trees
9:00 - NOTHING

saturday

10:35 - nbc - saturday night live (a la dvr)

sunday

7:00 - NOTHING
8:00 - NOTHING
9:00 - abc - brothers & sisters (duh)

how in the hell did monday become my favorite night for television?

Friday, October 13, 2006

i sometimes hate the things i realize.

earlier this week, it hit me that i have cried more often (and shamelessly so) in the last 2 years than i probably did in the 22 years prior combined.

in the sixth grade, i went through a moody phase, during which i would sometimes just start uncontrollably crying... sobbing really. i remember my mother being speechless because she had not seen me cry since i was a very wee child. she said even as a baby i was, on the whole, quiet. i never cried.

until now. these past 2 years have ruined my streak. i have cried a lot in the last 2 years. i. mean. a. lot.

in a stranger's house. in a bar. in a car. in another bar. in the street. in probably yet another bar (just guessing). in the bushes outside an apartment. in a stairwell. in a women's bathroom. in a restaurant. in a coffeeshop. in a movie theater. in my underwear. in the shower.

and the list goes on and on...

seriously?!? seriously.

what the fuck is up with the tears?

i thought part of growing up was crying less often. i guess i was mistaken.

...or is it that i've lost control of my emotions? i used to have such a grip on them, but now, it seems, i am just a vehicle for their outbursts.

i just don't understand it.

i was never a crybaby... until i grew up.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

the pain my absence has caused ch'all is palpable.
thanks for missing me so much.

some things i've been achingly missing:

macaroni & cheese
the dog
road trips
coloring books
lauryn hill
7 friends & 1 aim chatroom
having freckles
new york city
the cafeterias in bromley and busey-evans
scarves
cornfields
tapping kegs and mixing jungle juice
willow trees
the saxophone
academia
bill's toasty
thermal underwear
campfires/bonfires
1 mile road
chorus
too many people to count
isg
having all the answers

what've you been missing?

Friday, October 06, 2006

the proclamation came down.

svendella, mine fairy blogfather, sayeth: post or you're grounded!

...and so, i'm back, bitches.

i figured to christen my rebirth into the blogging world after almost a month of dead cyberair, i'd go to my go-to gal, the one who gave me life in the first place, the only woman whose vagina i've been inside (though this is the subject of much debate), that crazy lady of quips, zings, and burns...

my madre.

and so i share some of her most recent amusing musings.

on my brohem (what we say for brother in my fam) potentially joining the army...
madre: oh, brett! brett, we need you. you need to come home!
moi: dear lord, woman, what is wrong?!?
madre: brohem is talking about joining the army. we need you.
moi: oh my! yes, i'll be home. just say when. i want to be there for him and for you guys. i understand that you need me now.
madre: wait, what?
moi: i want to come home to support, ch'all.
madre: no, no, no, you sensitive susan, that's not what i need you for.
moi: well, then what are you getting all worked up about?
madre: i need you to give him his escape hatch.
moi: wtf?!?
madre: yeah, tutor him so if it ever gets scary he can just open the gay hatch and let the homo flow.
moi: *click* *sound that phones make when someone hangs up on you even though this conversation was on a cell phone and they don't make that sound*

on mr. foley and his page...
moi: hello!
madre: oh my god brett, you never told us you were a page in d.c.

on mr. mcgreevey and his book...
madre: so i watched oprah today and that gay governor from jersey was on there.
moi: james mcgreevey.
madre: yeah, that guy. whatever his name is. anyway, what's this masculine love all you gays are talking about? because if it involves a bedazzler... it ain't masculine, mcgreasey.

on the gilmore girls...
madre: did you watch the season premiere of gg?
moi: yeah, i caught the dvr'ed version molly left me.
madre: that's us you know. we're quirky and close and fun. we're lorelai and rory.
moi: i guess... yeah, i can see it.
madre: only, you know. like you'd have to be recast as a girl... oh no, no you wouldn't.
moi: yeah, and you'd have to be recast as someone cool.

on project runway (and anne heche, i guess)...
madre: so is that michael fellow gay or what?
moi: heck if i know.
madre: well, did he ping your gay sonar or not?
moi: ma, it's gaydar and mine's broken.
madre: we better get that fixed. don't want you falling for some anne heche with a penis.

on anne heche (and everwood)...
moi: molly and i have been watching "men in trees" lately, and we think it's cute. i didn't think i'd like it.
madre: well it does have anne heche in it.
moi: yeah, but i don't mind her. it was more the concept that bothered me.
madre: oh, so all you all have finally forgiven her for what she did to ellen?
moi: yes, but the jury's still out on the whole goddess celestia bit.
madre: i always did like her on "everwood".
moi: mom, for the last time, stop pushing "everwood" on me.
madre: well, sorry, i just thought the title alone would hook you.

and you all can't imagine what was keeping me away from the blog...

helloooooooooooo!

dealing with that woman is a full-time job.

and such is my life on the second shift.