i tan.
it's true. i do. not that you'd be able to tell from my pallor, but i pay money to lie semi-nude in a plastic bed while cancer is flung at me for 20 minutes. and i do this about 3 times a week. yep. it's hot, and i love it.
now that we're past that, on to the story.
so like 2 days ago, i decided it was a good day to stop on my way home and darken up, so i hopped off the red line at belmont and hurried up the stairs to my cancer den of choice. as always, there was a line... yes, a line to be uv'ed. there was some new girl signing up, and the whole process takes a bit of time what with the signing off on killing yourself at the responsibility of no one but yourself. as i stood there, cursing this girl for deciding to start tanning when i just needed to hop in a bed for 20 minutes, i wondered if the people behind me were thinking the same thing the day i joined the cult. as i pondered this, another guy entered the salon, reading a book as he slowly ascended the stairs. i was fascinated, of course, because i never saw other guys tanning. i watched as he entered and took his place at the end of the line. our wait continued, and he got antsy at the end of the line. he walked to and fro a bit, then decided to lean up against the wall.
it is here that i noted in my head that he wasn't leaning up against a wall, reading a book, at all. in fact, he was leaning up against the door to a room with a premiere tanning experience in it. he was leaning up against the door to the "silver bullet".
and then it happened... literally as i was about to open my mouth to tell him he was leaning on a door, the door gave way.
he fell inside the room.
he fell inside the room on the naked girl who had just finished tanning.
he fell inside the room on the naked girl who had just finished tanning and was wiping her sweat off the bed.
mortified for him, i swallowed my laughter and looked forward, listening to him profusely apologize as he awkwardly tried to close the set of double doors to the room.
i decided it only would have been funnier if she had fallen out of the room onto him.
posted by brett @ 4:40 PM
2 Comments:
I would have laughed. Snorted even. I hate those moment where you become embarassed for the other person, even though you had nothing to do with the cause of embarassment. I tan too frequently as well, but have not yet delved into *tanorexic* territory yet. I do however sear my ass with astounding regularity in the bed, so that i feel not unlike (is that a double negative?) a fine piece of fois gras.
~ciao bello
Jamie
i too used to tan. like, a LOT.
...until i had a pre-cancerous mole removed from my chest.
now all i've got are WRINKLES and pale, pale, deathly pale skin...
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